A woman of age

There are exactly 100 days from tomorrow until I turn 40. Yes I stated my age on paper and I then posted it on the internet for all to see. I am going to be 40 and I am okay with that! I stated in my first blog of the year that this was my year without a safety net and I wasn’t lying people! So I will scream it from the roof tops! I Jen Nickels will be 40 in May!!!!!!!

My son stated I was a “woman of age” I am not sure whether to ground his sorry ass or commend him for making a gal like me sound so posh. It is better than when he referred to me as being on the “shy side of cougar town”. That did earn a grounding!  I would have him call me an old bag before I let him call me a cougar! I only look, I never claw at the poor younger men for the love of Pete!

Seriously one gets quite reflective before a big birthday. I was having a conversation with a young gal a few weeks ago when I had my hair trimmed. She asked when it was that I felt truly comfortable in my skin. I was floored that a twenty something woman asked me my opinion on this matter. When I asked her why she asked me, she said it was because when I sat in the chair I told her what I wanted I said “Anything you think will look good, it’s just hair.” She said a woman who does that is pretty comfortable with herself. I am thinking that, or she doesn’t give a rat’s ass but I played along!

For every woman there is a different levels of comfort as we age. I felt the first level of comfort with myself between the ages of 25 and 30. I wasn’t a complete basket case before that worrying what everyone else thought of me, I just didn’t really care for myself that much. I had made a lot of mistakes, ones that I couldn’t change which was hard for me to deal with. Not for the affects they had on me but for those they had on others. But I learned from them and they helped to guide me in the direction I needed. I made peace during this first level as many women do. We can’t change what was, we can only make a better what could be. Sounds like a greeting card in the making.

I admit my next level was the one where I became a little too comfortable. I just really let myself go and lived without limitation. This is a level that we should all avoid. Never get so comfortable you stop caring about yourself. Sometime we are all we have, so we need take care of all that. And at 38 I finally did that again. I found a new grove which included eating right, exercising, fabulous shoes and finding new ways to express myself. The me now kind of kicks ass and I like her minus some flaws I hope to change this year. Like using the word ass, in every paragraph, okay cursing in general, former sailor what can I say.

So 100 days left! I plan to do quite a bit in those 100 days I expect each of you to use them as well. Like plan me a big flipping bash so we can party like rock stars! Get busy time is a wasting! ;-)